When someone wrongs you, how do you deal with that? Wherever two or more are gathered there will be a dispute before too long, and how disputes are handled is one of the main differences between people of faith and the pagans. 

One common way that is harmful to everyone involved is avoidance. Avoid the person, avoid the topic, pretend it didn’t happen or that it doesn't matter. 

Saint John Chrysostom took a far more direct approach.

Born in Antioch around 349 AD, John had such excellent speaking skills that he earned the name “Chrysostom,” meaning “golden mouthed.” After becoming a priest, his homilies were not just unique for their eloquence, but for how challenging they were. John returned again and again to the moral failings of his time, calling people to a higher way of life. 

Central to John Chrysostom’s legacy is his bold confrontation with the Roman Empress Eudoxia. Known for her luxurious lifestyle and tyrannical rule, Eudoxia epitomized the moral decay John sought to address. He directly rebuked the empress, calling her Jezebel (a wicked queen of Israel in the Old Testament). In response, she exiled him. 

Saint John Chrysostom spent the rest of his life in exile, but he never regretted the words he said to the empress. He had confronted the person who had wronged not just him, but all the Christians she ruled over.

That is what Jesus calls us all to do: “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you.” (Matthew 18:15) He does not call us to avoid problems or people.

We engage avoidance as a coping strategy, but it almost always leads to increasing stress and anxiety, and has a way of spreading into other areas of our lives. We are speaking of avoidance in the case of a dispute when someone has wronged you, but the same avoidance can easily manifest as procrastination, daydreaming and ruminating, and passive aggression. 

This avoidance results in our hearts growing bitter and resentful. Jesus proposes a different path: Confront those who wrong you.

There is the mark of genius and simplicity, as well as the mark of justice and goodness, in what Jesus is proposing here. The Gospel challenges us to face life head on, not to skirt the truth, not to avoid challenges. 

What problem or person have you been avoiding?



Feast Day: September 13

Patron Saint of: Education, Epilepsy, Lecturers, Public Speakers, and Preachers

Also Known As: The Golden Mouthed

Symbols: Holding a Gospel Book